there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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