This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
