I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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