So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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