Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Randomize
