So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
