White coat. Heels.
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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