ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize