I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I love you.
Bad choice
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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