I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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