Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Randomize
