Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize