I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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