i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
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