i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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