we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
