Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
