I want to walk on stilts...naked
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
