My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
