Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I'm bleeding and have questions
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
