I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I think my nap took me to another dimension
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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