Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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