why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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