I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
