Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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