I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
