Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
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Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
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The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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