yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
