Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
