And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Randomize
