everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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