member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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