Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
