90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?