Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
