i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
