I must be too annoying 4 u.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
