Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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