My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize