I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
birth control should be required to get into college
it glows. i had to have it.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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