I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
