Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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