guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
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