People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
