I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Randomize
