so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
