My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
