I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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