He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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