How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Randomize
